I Exist – II: The Broken Passage by orlandooom407

I love the sound of rugged hardcore punk musicians that always seem to find mutually beneficial relationships with sludge metal. Even if it’s just a touring relationship. In cases like the Australian based  I, Exist utilizes both elements in order to wield a concussive collection of  barbarous sweat soaked anthems.  This fixating familiar sound rings notice to the tones of bands like His Hero is Gone or From Ashes Rise. They found their sweet spot with a tasteful tirade of toasty southern punk and metal. Bring ‘yer deepest bowls and serve up a heaping helping of this contusing cram-worthy (neo)crust chowder.

With the way II: The Broken Passage begins you’d think this record was written from deep in the heart of Beale street. That’s attributed to the burgeoning blues tinged fire of the guitars right from the get go. They’re soon joined by the bellows of attrition similar to that of Pliocene era Baroness. The majority of the tracks average about three minutes in length each. Inside these accounts you’ll be met with stomping synergy between the toight hardcore percussive attacks, dust spewing triple guitar congelations, and an un-showered suburban ham-beast sized bass tone.

Certain tracks on this record tend to lumber around like a day drinking Crowbar song. “Lungs of Mire” starts out that way, but shortly thereafter reaches full ignition. Aforementioned propulsion flings them into another furious hard styled sprint before concluding with a dismembering digression. Nothing left behind but a curling channel of feedback. Contrarily the coin flips on the proceeding track, entitled “Fleshold”, and promotes an authoritative salty shore hardcore vibe. I wonder what exactly a “fles hold” entails. I do know that I wouldn’t want to find myself on the receiving end of one given the bewildering antagonistic structure of the song itself. Less than a minute of beat down later we’re back to the battering slow motion crawling similar to that of Weedeater or Sourvein.

The record leaves you on that same motif, but may or may not contain an invigorating climactic guitar solo.

Summative Sentence: Golden fried sludge punk seasoned with an antagonistic blend of give an and take tenacity and subsequent delta derived heavy metal.

Favorite Track: Lungs of Mire

Click here to purchase or download II: The Broken Passage available on Prosthetic Records.

Click here to check out I, Exist on Facebook.

– Jared Oates Haggard


Time Lapse Video of Scale the Summit Flier by orlandooom407

This is the next flier by Keith Carlson for an upcoming show on February 18th at Will’s Pub in Orlando. The bill consists of the touring duo Scale the Summit (Prosthetic Records) and Elitist (Blkheart Group) supported by locals Abuse and Fire in the Cave.

You can find the Facebook event here with links to each band.

If you haven’t heard Scale the Summit yet, please direct yourself to my obligatory, yet relevant, digression below:


– Jared Oates Haggard

Skeletonwitch – Forever Abomination by orlandooom407

I am writing this review as a public service announcement to all those of you who are concerned about the negative effects of ‘heavy music’ on yourselves, your loved ones, and most importantly, your children.  The vile band of heathens that call themselves ‘Skeletonwitch‘ are the perfect poster-children for the sort of amoral depravity I’m talking about here.  Now, I don’t have a problem with their actual name, as everyone knows that the only good witch is a skeleton witch because that means she has been properly burned at the stake.  But even the most cursory examination of the band’s so-called ‘logo’ turns up no less than seventeen (17) blasphemous and/or blatantly Satanic icons, including upside-down crosses, pentagrams, the head of Baphomet, and what appears to be an image of Jesus eating a bean burrito and wiping his face with the Shroud of Turin.

Add to this heinous idolatry the name of their most recent album: Forever Abomination.  I don’t know about you, but to me it sounds almost like they’re proud of it.  I won’t even get into the cover art as it is possibly one of the most obscenely genital-ridden panoplies of subliminal sex messages since Disney’s ‘Little Mermaid’.  I forced myself to listen to the entire album so I could be sufficiently knowledgeable on the disgusting topics and horrific Hell-spawned evil sounds contained therein and be able to properly prepare you all for the likely (nay, inevitable) march to world domination by hordes of unwashed ‘heshers’ this album will unleash upon an unsuspecting, God-fearing world.

First off, this album appears to have made its filth-ridden nest in the genre known as ‘blackened thrash’.  I was fooled by this moniker at first; again I assumed that the ‘blackened’ referred to the sanctified burning of all things unclean (devil music, Harry Potter, movies with Dakota Fanning in them) but apparently it actually refers to a vocal style perpetuated in the early 90s in Norway.  I’m in favor of Norway: they were wise enough to enforce a state-sponsored official religion, unlike the liberal hippie ‘freedom of religion’ crap we have here.  Unfortunately Norway is now in line for a hearty smiting for giving birth to the demonic screeching of so-called ‘black metal’.  Next we come to ‘thrash’.  Again, I was comforted by this term, assuming (as any pious man would do) that it referred either to the cleansing self-flagellation with studded leather straps that is the only true way to free one’s body of sin, or the appropriate police response to long-haired Democratic weirdos congregating in groups to whine about their ‘rights’.  Sadly, neither of these turned out to be true; instead my head was sodomized in a most unholy fashion by hammering riffs and acid-throated howling.  ‘Shredding Sacred Flesh’? ‘Infernal Resurrection’? ‘Reduced to the Failure of Prayer’? Do these monsters hold nothing sacred?

Well, clearly they don’t, and just as clearly they are completely unrepentant savages content to wallow in the juices of their own ungodly corruption.  So unless you relish the thought of having your brain seared by ‘blackened thrash’ that will make Jesus weep into his Gordita Supreme, stay far, far away from this album and may God have mercy on your soul!

Click here to order Forever Abomination, available from Prosthetic Records for only $10!

– Gregor Von Leakenhawer

Webcomic Wednesday – Gojira vs Gigan by orlandooom407

With Keith Carlson, the puns and double entendres are never in short supply. Thanks again for a just tribute to two mind- melting progressive death metal bands. Even if they aren’t really touring together.

Check out the newest release from Gigan, entitled Quasi-Hallucinogenic Soundscapes, on the Willowtip Bandcamp page.

Check out Gojira on Facebook.

– Jared Oates Haggard